"to have found God and to still pursue Him is the soul's paradox of love."
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you know that lie that you can't be good without being perfect first? the one we know isn't true but then deep down still believe?
it hit me the other day that I had cradled that lie in my heart. I had let it have a piece of control. every failure, small or big, had the power to crush me. for every little mistake screamed, "you're not good. you're not a nice person because you just spoke too harshly or impatient. you're not worthy to be loved because look how much you fail. you won't be good enough for anything until you reach that..." and thats exactly where Satan wants us. those are his lies he screams inside our heads, and sometimes we don't even recognize it until its ruining us inside. and the more he screams it, the more we believe it and the more impatient and frustrated we become. and that was me. I hated myself because I wasn't perfect. I pushed people away because I didn't feel like I deserved to be loved by them because I failed....to be perfect. tears swell in my eyes as I write these words. for my heart aches and breaks for every other person who has unconsciously cradled this lie in their heart as well. I am here to say that you are good. your mistakes don't measure your value. you don't have to always be so strong. its okay to hurt and break sometimes. give yourself some grace. Jesus loves you so incredibly much just the way you are, and if others don't, that is okay! It doesn't lessen your value, it doesn't make you any less of a good person.. come to His arms with all your rags and bruises. let Him cover you with His healing blood and clothe you with His robe of righteousness. oh dear soul, you will never be perfect. stop trying so hard. put those lies in the grave and walk away free; Jesus died for this! the only thing good you can ever hold is His love within your heart. let that be where your goodness and value flows from. you'll never be truly strong unless you let Him be strong for you. He is ready with arms wide open, you'll never be hugged by gentler arms or held so tightly and securely. you'll never be so loved and accepted as you will within His heart. "as many as received him, to them gave He power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on His name." - John 1:12 "for everyone that thirsts, come to the Water of life" and you will find healing.
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23 | Wife | Servant of Jesus | friend | health enthusiast | animal lover | traveling | adventurist | music
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